4 Reasons Why People Get Opportunities

There's the saying, "Good things come to those who wait."

But it's not as simple as waiting. You must plant and water seeds and be patient as they grow. What are you doing now to see the results you are looking for later?

This summer, there has been much online discourse about being seen within the content creator and entrepreneur communities. Being seen means wanting to be validated for the work you do.

You've put in this work and time into your craft, but sometimes it doesn't feel enough to be chosen for a "Best of List," invited on a brand trip or dinner, asked to speak, or participate in a conference or festival. You sit back and wonder when it will be my turn.

But the real question is why being a part of those things has to validate your work. Why aren't the clients, customers and community that you serve enough for that validation?

And maybe it's not that simple. FOMO is very real. However, one thing we forget when we see certain people get opportunities is what comes into play behind the scenes. There are four reasons why someone may get a chance over someone else: 

Nepotism: This is why networking is essential. People give opportunities to the people they know. The gatekeepers must know that you are trustworthy, can deliver quality work, and won't tarnish their good name. 

Popularity: Likeability and pretty privilege get the opportunity. I don't care what you say about "pretty privilege"; this is a thing. Some people are naturally attractive and easy on the eye, which draws people to them and helps them garner followers and influence. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but if you're looking good, smelling good, and giving a nice smile, sometimes it's enough to get in the door. It's what you do once you're in the door that matters. But not all "pretty" people are likable, so that's where some of us average folks come in. Your name can be spoken in rooms just by an encounter that made an impression on someone who said, "I like her. Let's work with her."

Value: I remember being fresh out of college and in the middle of my job search when someone I wanted access to asked me what I could do in return for getting access to her network. I told her, "I'm fresh out of school and have nothing to give. I need a favor, and I got you afterward." She said, "We all have something to offer. Come back to me when you figure that out." I didn't understand what she wanted from me, and then, one day, it clicked. She had a terrible social media presence and was planning to speak at an event. I asked if she needed someone to capture content, and that value opened doors for me. Some people get opportunities because an exchange is happening. People are making good on their favors. Some people get invited because their follower numbers bring value. Some people have access to gatekeepers or hold the purse strings to funding. Your value can be having a hedge fund or being a parent at a school someone is trying to get their child into. Knowing what value to bring will always make room for you. 

Go-getter: The last way to get opportunities is to go for it. When was the last time you saw a chance that someone got? Instead of being jealous or wishing it was you, you emailed the brand, business, or organizer to introduce yourself and ask them to keep you in mind for an opportunity or ask for their time to bring them into your network. I see too many people in Facebook groups, IG stories, and Threads complaining about not being included or invited to participate but never doing the work to be seen. When opportunities are being announced, are you reaching out to see how you could get involved instead of sitting around and waiting to be seen? People won't see you until you make them see you.  

Since moving back to Middle Tennessee, here are some of the ways I made myself seen:

In 2018, I wanted to contribute as a writer to local outlets to share stories. I pitched myself to Nashville Lifestyles and ended up getting to write my first cover story. I also saw many content creators get opportunities to do segments on Talk of the Town, so I pitched myself and spoke on working from home.

In 2019, a media relations panel social post circulated online. The panel featured an all-white women's panel. I emailed the event organizer, introduced myself, and asked to be on the panel, and they added me to the lineup.

In 2022, I noticed that many media and content creator events in Nashville lacked diversity. I emailed the organizers, and not only was I added to the lists, but I have also started partnering with the teams to invite you all to these new spaces. 

In 2023, I saw the Kate Spade lemon collection being sent to influencers like Skylar Marshai. So, I found the Kate Spade influencer marketing contact and pitched myself to receive items for the collection to wear at a #L2LMixer. I also asked friends to tag me on their lemon posts. 

Last year, I noticed the need to get different people in the room, so I started the invite-only happy hours. If you are a content creator, members of the PR team that make event lists are at the happy hour. If you are in PR looking to diversify your influencer lists and looking to hire more diverse talent, they come to the events. If you are a business owner looking for media opportunities, media professionals are in the room, even some who help curate those "Best of" lists. You have to show up to get what you want.

We waste time hating, wishing or being jealous. Shift your mindset to see someone win and find a way to win with them. I absolutely believe that I can get what someone else gets, too. Make the ask, invite someone into your network, and deliver everything you say you would.